7. Memories of Fran from Family

Many friends and family members have shared colorful and wonderful memories.  This post will include the "kin by blood" family members. 

Mary May Angelil, The Firstborn Child      
Mother’s sense of faith showed, not only in her church work, but in other areas as well.  How many women can say they lived with their mother-in-law their whole married life and never had a cross word?  Mother taught us to receive compliments by turning them back to the person with,  “How nice of you to say so.”  or “Thank you for noticing.”        
         

Mother’s sense of adventure shows in her offspring.  Every year, she and Daddy planned a vacation for educational purposes.  We went to Niagara Falls, The World’s Fair in New York in 1965, the Midwest to visit relatives, Florida and other places.  She had “childlike enthusiasm” which was contagious.
        

Mother’s sense of style showed in many areas, such as her beautifully decorated cakes and her angel Christmas tree.  Money was tight when we were growing up but in later years, shopping for clothes became Mom’s hobby.   Mother always fought her weight.  She and Aunt Mary were less than a year apart so people thought they were twins.  However, Aunt Mary was thin as a rail, while Mother was chunky.  They used to say that Mother ate her own food, then pushed Aunt Mary off the bench and ate hers, too. 
            

A sense of humor is what I most admired and enjoyed about Mother.  She didn’t like the Greeting Time (Passing of the Peace) during the church service.   If you’re young, you won’t understand this but…..she called it Howdy Doody Time……when you say howdy to everyone.    

Mother always hated brown.  When they were young, people who sold baskets and other handmade items came from down in the country in the summer .  They got Aunt Mary this little green chair.  It was sooo pretty and it had flowers on it!  They got Mom a BROWN chair.  When it was time for school, they got Aunt Mary the prettiest little blue raincoat with red lining, trim and buttons.  They got Mom a BROWN coat.   

Every summer, before Mother could drive, Daddy would take us down to Grandmama Freeman’s for a week or two.  There was no air conditioning in cars in those days.  I remember stopping for gas and seeing a couple of nuns in full habit – probably the first nuns we’d ever seen.  Mother couldn’t imagine how they could stand the heat in those heavy black robes.  When we got back in the car she said,  “I’ll bet those nuns get in the car, put the dash fans on high and just let them blow up under those robes.”

Anita May Krull, the Middle Child

Our mom had strong family values.
She was a hard worker:
  She canned beans, tomatoes, peaches and apple sauce
  She washed thousands of dishes and clothes
  And she fed us, clothed us, encouraged us, called us, visited us and wrote us

She left us many memories:
     -She loved the birds and had a bird feeder outside our kitchen window
    -She decorated a lot of cakes for people’s birthdays. She was creative and her cakes were beautiful.
     -She would get us up in the morning by saying "Rise and Shine" and sometimes she would sing it  "Rise and shine and give God the glory, glory. Rise and shine and give God the glory, glory, Rise and Shine and give God the glory, glory, Children of the Lord"
    -She did a lot of fried chicken on Sunday lunch
    -When we were hungry at night she used to say" Go get yourself a piece of butter bread!"
    -She collected bells and liked the song' "When they ring those heaven bells"

Philip Freeman May, the Baby           

There are so many things to think about when remembering my mother.

Mom's cooking comes to mind.  She used to present quite the spread of food to all the hay-baling help during the summer.  We were all exhausted after baling hay.  There would be ice tea.... the sweetest ice tea in the world, hot dogs and/or hamburgers, steaks, chicken, rolls, beans, slaw, corn, taters of various sorts, and of course apple sauce.  Then there was desert:  ice cream, pie, cake ... always something yummy!  It was always a good time for stuffing ourselves and telling a zillion jokes and making a zillion puns over one word or another.   Good times!

 You can read Phil's eulogy here:  http://angeliladventures.blogspot.com/2011/01/philips-eulogy-for-mom.html

Ellen Krull, First grandchild 

When I think of my Grandmother May, I remember the summers I went and visited her at her house. She would always be standing on her porch waving and welcoming us. And, of course, she gave us all great big hugs. I can still see this image in my head of my Grandmother. 

When I was very little, some mornings Grandmother and I would be the first to wake up in the early morning. On mornings such as these, my Grandmother and I would get in her car and go down to the post office to pick up her mail before it was delivered. It wasn't often that I got to have my Grandmother all to myself and I really enjoyed this special time with her. 

My Grandmother was very patient, no matter what was happening, she was calm and laid back. I enjoyed it when she took us to the book fair. I also enjoyed breakfast at her house because she had bagels! This was something I didn't get to have very often.  I am glad I got to know my Grandmother because she was a remarkable, loving, and kind lady.

April Krull, 2nd Grandchild    

wrote on Facebook on 1-17-11:  “RIP Grandmother May, you will always be in my heart....” 
          After several supportive comments from friends, she said,  "Thanks for your support u guys.  We all knew it was coming but to get the call at 2 am I was not expecting it and it hit me a reality check. It just makes me think we need to be thankful for the time we have here and thank God everyday for it.   At less I know now, she is not trapped in a body that doesn't work any more, but has a new body with no pain and works. She will really be missed....."

Levi Walker May, 3rd  Grandchild, The only “May” to carry on the family name
I remember the swimming pool Grandmother always had in the yard when I would visit her every summer.  I used to have a lot a fun splashing around in it with my cousins, April and Ellen.

Every summer my Cousin Bill May would let me borrow one of his 4 wheelers to ride around the farm with when I would visit Grandmother.  I used to go around and around the farmhouse and every time I would pass by the kitchen window Grandmother was always there waving and smiling at me.

After meals at the farm Grandmother would let me take all the scraps out to the fence and feed the cows.  I used to love to watch the cows come running over to me to get the scraps.

Back in the spring of 2008 I came up to visit my Grandmother and attend an open house at JMU called Choices.  It was a 4 day trip for me with 2 of the days visiting JMU and the other 2 days spending time with my Grandmother, just the two of us, together.  She insisted on ironing my shirts and made blueberry pancakes for me.  She made me feel so special.  She was so proud of me for choosing JMU for college.  I'm glad I made her proud!

Ever since I was a young boy I can remember Grandmother telling me I was the only one to carry on the May name in our family.  She used to tell me to make her proud.  I hope she knew how much I loved her.

 

Duane Krull, Great Grandson

On the way home from Grandmother’s funeral in Virginia, 6-year-old Duane happened to share a thought. He said " Do you know why Grandmother May died?   It was because she was a very kind person and Jesus wants kind people like her to be in heaven with him."

Bobz Freeman, nephew who lives in Asheville, NC      
There are so many memories it is hard to separate them.   My most vivid early memory is of THE WEDDING (of Red and Fran).   I can still see the rose arbor that they took their vows under.  I remember thinking how pretty Auntie Frances looked.  Hey, I was six years old, you know, and I was wondering who that red-headed stranger was that was taking her away from us.   Probably due to the fact that she and Aunt Mary were away in college and I was spending a lot of time with my maternal grandparents in Grayson County Virginia, I have no recollections beyond the wedding.
           

My next memories were of your family visits to Dobson each summer.   This was something we looked forward to with great anticipation and excitement.  I was always impressed that Auntie Frances and Uncle Red dressed up in their "Sunday go to meetin' clothes" for this occasion.   Even Mary Lib, 'Nita and Philip were always "spic and span."  I always wondered how y'all could stand to travel dressed that way..…  remember this was the days before A/C.   Uncle Red's car was a big black Pontiac, about a 1949 as I recall.  I still picture the big metal sun visor on the outside of the windshield.  It must have covered the top half of the windshield.
           

Then, of course, there are our visits to Mocking Bird Hill Farm.   What a wonderful place and what a "spread" Auntie Frances always put on the table.  She was always the gracious and wonderfully happy hostess.  But this is nothing new, as so many attested to at the (funeral) Service.  She was always smiling, always happy, always so polite and nice, but so emotionally strong - a true Southern Lady as someone said.   Those memories don't stand out because we were so accustomed to her being that way.  That was just Auntie Frances and we never knew any different.
           

I was too choked up at the service but had I been able to speak after my baby brother's remarks, I would have corrected him on one point.  I don't think Grandmother Freeman was too sad to see her baby girl go off to Virginia.   After all, she was a native of Culpeper, Virginia and was probably glad to see one of her children return to that beautiful country.   Mockingbird Hill Farm will never be the same without Auntie Frances.

Bill Freeman, nephew who lives in Winston, NC.
I am one of the Freemans from way down south in the Cradle of Civilization, Dobson, NC.  At least, that is what my wife calls it.  I did not want to do this and did not think I could, but if Phil can sing, surely I can talk.  I don’t have to tell you folks what a wonderful lady Aunt Fran was, because most of you knew her as well or better than I.  
           

I will try to add a little levity to this service and some of my remarks will be better understood by family members who know the family better.  There has been a lot of talk about Fran’s lack of any pretension.  The reason for that is that she had an older sister, who you have not heard anything about, who got it all.
           

My family has lived in NC since the Revolutionary War and most of us never left NC.  The family was very concerned when Fran moved off to Virginia to marry a farmer, but I guess it worked out OK.  They were also very concerned that she became a Methodist.  They were all Baptist and not at all sure that any Methodists would make it to heaven.  I guess that worked out OK also.  But the thing I could never get over was when I spent a week with her when I was young and discovered she did not know how to make cornbread.
            

You have all heard a lot about Fran’s sister, Mary.  Well she also had an older sister that you never hear anything about.  Now I know things are very peaceful in Heaven, but there is probably a big argument going on there now.  When Fran got to heaven,  I am sure that she was so happy to see her mother and sister Mary.  However, the bad news is that Aunt Lib was there also and she would not approve of Fran’s dress and would be ordering Fran to change into something more appropriate immediately.  Fran would stand her ground and neither would give in.

Thank all of you for being so wonderful to my Aunt Fran and for being here today.  She was truly a wonderful lady and we will all miss her.
            

Stashia May Kline, niece           

Mary, you know there are no coincidences with God.  I "happened" to play "Surely the Presence" at church on Sunday as well.  I know I am getting old when I remember LOTS and LOTS of things from childhood. I was remembering some little sheep that Aunt Fran used to have on one of her end tables in the living room upstairs when we were young. I was also remembering how she used to let us comb her hair when I am sure she had lots of other things she could have been doing. Both our mothers were exceptions to the rules as far as many mothers go.  Since the Mays were always so close anyway, I considered your mommy my second mom. It was special that she played my mom in a church play one time. Kenneth Davis was a fireman and saved me and had to carry me somewhere.
            

I remember when your mom also played a black character in a play at the Singers Glen Elementary School at the time. She was all padded up with pillows, had a red kerchief around her head and with her natural southern accent, she played the perfect part of a "Mammie."  I think they did several productions of that play.
            

I also enjoyed helping her as a volunteer assistant in her first class classroom at Mt. Clinton at the beginning of school before I went to college. That was good experience for me. Who would have thought I would teach 1st grade for 4 years!  She was great!!!!!  

Patty May Golightly, niece

When I think of Auntie Fran, I remember coming up to eat in your kitchen when you all still lived upstairs.  I remember eating rum cake.  I was in hog heaven -- I’d never eaten anything so good in my life!  To this day I love rum cake.

I remember  your little dog, Perky (mostly Chihuahua)  went missing and you all were in a panic.  She was gone for days .   She was found in the “cubby hole” closet over the stairway in Phil’s room.

Auntie Fran liked to read and I always felt I had to be quiet so she could concentrate.  She had an accident in her little green Rambler – rolled it down over a little hill.    I was glad she wasn’t hurt but I always thought about that when I drove by that place.

I remember the flannel board stories she told at church.   I thought it was so neat that she could get pictures to stick on that board. 

I loved her Southern accent.  She seemed to pick it up again when she went to NC each summer.  When she first got back, I had a hard time understanding her – it was like a foreign language.   

When I see families that don't have good memories like we do, I feel bad for them for what they missed.

Becky and Bill May, nephew and his wife

(Becky sang at Mother's Home Going Service and Bill kept her driveway clear of snow for many years.)      

Bill and I were talking and the one thing that stands out in his mind about Aunt Fran was her fabulous chocolate chip pancakes. He has raved about those since we started dating in 1967. I never could duplicate them. I remember your Mom for her beautifully decorated Christmas trees. I thought the fact that she rotated the theme each year was quite unique. I liked the Angel theme the best. I always looked forward to her Christmas card, too.  It very often was a beautiful Angel. She took great care in selecting the unusually pretty ones. 

Bill and I both commented on what a pleasant person she was. It always felt good to be around her with her giving and hospitable ways. Her countenance always reflected her positive and encouraging nature. She will be sorely missed by all.   Our heart goes out to you, Mary, Anita and Philip.  Please know our prayers will continue for you all.

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